Looking for Jerry Maguire-Esque Partnership/Agent/Manager to Complete Me


"You bet on me, like I bet on you." - Rod Tidwell

Which guy out there doesn't want a bond like that? One of the most romantic movie lines uttered from one guy to another... although, "I wish I knew how to quit you" ranks up there as well. But, if you're not sharing a tent with that man for days on end, I'm going to go with Rod Tidwell's line as my favorite.

Some of you may know that I have been spending a lot of time in Los Angeles lately, where I am living a teenage dream. I've been trying to sell my screenplay, whilst also working on a new screenplay and blogging more frequently. At this time, I would love to find a literary agent/manager/partner to join me in this endeavor - someone who can do the selling, as I focus on my writing. I need a Jerry Maguire to my Rod Tidwell, an Ari Gold to my Vinny Chase, a Thelma to my Louise, a Larry to my Balki Bartokomous...


I have high hopes for my writing career - one that I hope culminates in selling several screenplays and possibly a book or two, and deteriorates into late night partying with Gary Busey, Nicholas Cage, and Charlie Sheen. I also hope it culminates in a bromance of epic proportions - one where my agent and I watch our kids grow up, and in interviews with media organizations, I shed tears as I call you my "ambassador of Quan." Maybe my father didn't love me enough as a child, although those cigarette butts put out on my arm might constitute affection in some remote countries, but I need someone to believe in me as I believe in them.

When times are down, and I've drunken myself into punching my landlord once again, it's in those moments that I hope we pick each other up. When I'm in jail for the 15th time and you're up at 4am bailing me out, it's times like those that I want to look at you with glazed over eyes and say with loving fervor: "Can you take me to Jack in the Box?"

That's true love, my friend.

Since love with a female has thus far escaped me, and all my other bros are married, engaged, or with awesome women (Nahal!!!), I have an emptiness that is best filled when I write.

I know the success rate of selling your first screenplay is almost non-existent, but I'm not going to give up. I'm going to keep writing... (working on that second now!) In the meantime, I just want to thank you for being one of the 105,000+ mentally disturbed people whom have visited and read stories on my blog. Your loyalty will always give me a sense that I have already succeeded. (Eat that, ABC Family movie ending lines!!!)

As for my future agent, please, I want you to be there for me as I stand naked in front of you in the locker room "air drying" and both of us are hanging by a thin thread and I tell you, "I DIG that about you!" We can do this together, or, I can say: "f*ck you, Jobu, I do it myself."

But... I'd much rather be naked standing with you...


Love,
Kevin L.
The SVB

P.S. It doesn't have to be a "bromance," a "girl-friend-bromance" is just as suitable. (Somehow, I don't think the term "girl-friend-bromance" is going to take off. But I call dibs!!!) If you know any literary agents or talent managers... or you want to take that plunge with me - let's find success together. Message me.

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2 comments :

  1. All good teams you referenced but what you really need is a 'Charlie Runkle' to your 'Hank Moody' ...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great call, Mark! I LOVE that show. And in all actuality, I fit the mold of "Hank Moody" more than anyone else I listed!

    ReplyDelete

 
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