Goodbye Silicon Valley

When I tell people I'm going to Thailand - I typically get the skeptical 'you pervert' look that they try so desperately to hide. How crazy that an entire country has become synonomous with prostitution. For the record, I'm a thinly-veiled pervert, not an openly soul-less pervert. I've never been one for strip clubs and I would just as soon give up in life if I had to resort to paying for sexual gratification. (But I would offer my forbidden fruit to someone for the right price! Say a Big Mac w/cheese, no onions?)

Well, this next trip of mine in my conquest of all the world's beaches, will take me to Phuket and maybe one or more of the surrounding islands, like Phi Phi - home of the Leo DiCaprio movie 'The Beach'. I never saw the movie, but I can't wait to practice my punching like Leo did in the previews. Somehow, I don't think that's caught on as much as running up the steps in Philly.

Finally, I'll embark on a pilgramage back to the maiden country, Taiwan, where my parents grew up in. I've never been there, so I plan to walk around and say to random strangers 'I'm home. Welcome me in your arms, my people.' I'll hug them and shush them as I say, 'cry no more, your prodigal son has returned.'

This trip will be a much needed break. It's been a year and a half since I've been immersed in Silicon Valley and its ways, working for MerchantCircle. I'm eager to ditch the BlackBerry and its constantly flashing red-light that enslaves me. I can no longer take the incessant burning sensation that I'm missing something if I don't log into my Facebook or Myspace account. I'm tired of reading TechCrunch every waking moment and checking to see which random stranger wants to be my contact on LinkedIn. I hate that I check Google Analytics far too often to see my referring sources, traffic, and unique visits to this very blog. Who really cares?

I'm a slave to this virtual world and I love it and hate it. At this moment, I feel empty and a bit sad. There are many other reasons, but tomorrow I will be shedding a large part of my life over the last 1.5 years .......... I'm leaving my laptop at home. I will miss you Facebook, Myspace, TechCrunch, ValleyWag, LinkedIn, Yahoo Fantasy Sports (don't fret, I've already set my fantasy basketball team all the way through mid-March. PLEASE don't anyone get injured!), Google Calendar, Blogger, Dictionary.com, Wikipedia, YouPorn (see!! thinly veiled), and of COURSE MerchantCircle.

I love you.....

Sincerely,
Kevin Leu
The Silicon Valley Bachelor

P.S. You thought I was going to get serious didn't you? But for real, I love you and will miss you Mom, Dad, Alda, Jessica, Jessalyn, Reza, Wes, Hendo, Patty, Seth, Jenny, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins..... If anything happens to me, please set my fantasy lineup for me sis.

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